Little has changed since my last post. Caregiving continues. The Day Job sputters. But I now rise at 2am—allowing myself three hours to work on my eternal novel project undisturbed. Or, mostly undisturbed. There’s always the cat.
I know it sounds crazy but that part of every day is mine. I plot out my schedule so I can be in bed early and not sabotage the tea and solitude with sleep. Every other hour I am running from task to task trying to keep loved ones fed, medicated, transported and comfortable.
It’s a strange role for me. I’ve never had kids so being responsible for others at this level is terrifying at times. And this path takes only one direction—from heartache to heartache.
But you have to find a place where you can set it all aside and still be you—if only just clinging to one tiny thread. If you can’t or don’t, you’ll diminish to the point of disappearing. And no longer be the fighter that your loved ones depend on.
The paying gig has been slow this quarter but family needs have taken up all slack. As a result, my big goal for completing a second draft of my novel by the end of June is pretty much DOA. This week I am finishing up some unpleasant tasks (read: 2018 taxes) and other odds and ends with a view to getting back to The Book by next Monday.
In the meantime, I have been toying with flash memoir to hone my writing skills. As long as I am slogging through the construction phases of my Main Project, I don’t get the chance to put much practice into word crafting. I hope that by drilling down on these very short pieces, I will be more prepared when my longer works are ready for the final polishing.
I’ve written more about this on my writing blog here.
My first two flash memoir items are here and here.
Mr. Grackle in snow – Picture by: Lausanne Davis Carpenter
The best remedy for surviving a twelve-hour day in cubicle-land is to spend my early mornings on my own goals. I have posted on LDavisCarpenter about the challenges of writing historical fiction and am starting a Flash Memoir side-project while chipping away at my novel.
I am reasonably confident in my non-fiction abilities but creative writing is – whew. I know how long it takes to develop any new skill so I want to use my life experiences as material for word-crafting practice – before I am faced with final edits of my long fiction. Flash Memoir seems like a good choice for distilling memories into words that transport a reader to another’s time, place, thoughts and senses. I also think it will be fun to capture snippets of my own crazy life in this form.
Meanwhile, you can see last summer’s mural on the Marsh Hawk Studio blog. I still plan to do a process post showing the steps to creating it but those pictures are on my other laptop which an Office update recently corrupted and can no longer access the internet. (Yes, thank you very much.) I will soon update the Long Ago & Far Away blog with notes on Conn Iggulden’s Genghis Khan series.
If I can ever get my blogs up to date AND have a day off – I’ll be back to writing my novel.
***About Mr. Grackle – just a fellow at my feeder on a snowy morning back in VA. Those eyes look like I feel most mornings before tea.